Closing Triangles
I think of myself as nurturing networks and communities as well as individuals and organizations. And one strategy I use is network weaving. Network Weaving describes the connection made between two people I know who don’t yet know each other as closing a triangle, because in a network map, this is exactly what it looks like!
credit: NetworkWeaving
Here, in this post, I want to talk specifically about my practice of making introductions. I had been connecting people for a long time before I met Ken Homer, but his introduction format really set the bar for me. When he introduced me to another one of his connections, I felt like I was glowing! Wow, that is how I want people to feel when I connect them.
Sure, I want them to feel good and associate that with me. Less egotistically, I want the time I take to make an introduction to be time well spent for all of us. I want them to feel great about connecting to the person I introduce them too. I want it to be useful all around. This is not about quantity for me, it is about quality. So, here is the pattern I use, developed in part through what Ken demonstrated.
I described it on twitter today.
- describing strengths of each
After stating the purpose of the email (useful for any and all starts to email conversation), describe relevant and positive strengths of each person to each other.
My wording for this is usually, “Person A, please allow me to introduce you to Person B. Person B is passionate about x, has terrific skills in y, and wants to explore z. ” Followed by the inverse, “Person B, please allow me to introduce you to Person A. Person A is passionate about m, has terrific skills in n, and wants to explore o.” This is a rough format, each one is different, but they all fit within that general pattern. Also, the adjectives are always chosen to fit the people I am describing. Use your own. - point to alignment & mutual benefit
I like to point to something that makes the people I am connecting clear about what they have in common. I don’t mean that they both read books. I mean that they are both within a particular field or sub-domain, know people in common, or have a similar passion about making the world a better place (and do so coming from a similar mindset).
I also like to point out what I imagine might be the mutually beneficial initial outcome from each party taking the time to make the connection. It might not be what actually happens, but it gives them some sense of why I am making the connection and what each might gain from it. - name small first step
Sometimes I forget to leave this in. However, after receiving several wonderful network weaving emails from others, I realized how vital this is. I received some letters, saw the alignment, and yet I might not know what to do about it. So in my introduction, I have been adding some suggestion for a first step – “In a 15 minute phone call, I think you could discuss your shared interest in x.”
That examples covers part of #2 and also #3. It doesn’t have to be long. Often I might have had an extended discussion with one of the parties, so I can point to what I have refined as a conversation starter for them.
I find that this often makes clear too what role I want one to play to the other. Maybe I am asking Person A to mentor Person B on a subject area. Or maybe I want Person B to introduce Person A to someone within their network who can help in a more targeted fashion. Being clear on roles can help people feel the respect I am offering them as well as make choices about what they want to be.
I hope these patterns help you make connections between two people.
1Jean Russell/Nurture
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 16:34
Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d #nurturegirlguide #networkweaving cc @sheriherndon @tresha @juneholley @HeidiEKMasssey @amoration
2christineegger
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 16:43
All introductions are not created equal. Here's how to be doin' it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
3rick champ
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 16:45
Interesting thoughts on Networking & Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
4Sharon59
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 16:59
RT @CDEgger: All intros are R not creatd equal. Here's how 2 be doin' it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
5Valdis Krebs
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 17:26
RT @NurtureGirl: Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d #nurturegirlguide #networkweaving cc @sheriherndon @tresha @juneholley @HeidiEKM …
6Christine Egger
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 17:41
Clear & illuminating post, Jean. You simply rock.
7Kristin Wolff
wrote on 11 January 2010 at 22:32
Nicely done Jean. I’m sending to this to my colleagues for both content and clarity. Coming back out west anytime soon;-)?
8Beth Kanter
wrote on 12 January 2010 at 21:56
OMG .. serendipity strikes again! I’m thinking about my lessons learned – and was thinking about real time network weaving and while I was thank you noticed your triangle title and had to click. Glad I did. Thanks
9Heidi Massey
wrote on 13 January 2010 at 0:26
Love this post by @nurturegirl about network weaving. How do you close the triangles 4 the ppl in your network? http://bit.ly/6dRXdc
10leslie_lovett
wrote on 14 January 2010 at 12:24
Nurture » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
11Kami Huyse
wrote on 14 January 2010 at 15:13
Must-read article by @nurturegirl about networking, includes an action step http://bit.ly/7C00pK
12EZF_TopMoms
wrote on 14 January 2010 at 15:40
RT @kamichat: Must-read article by @nurturegirl about networking, includes an action step http://bit.ly/7C00pK
13Zoetica
wrote on 14 January 2010 at 15:50
A Kami bookmark: Nurture » Closing Triangles: The art and science of being a connector http://bit.ly/6GkgfD
14Lauren Vargas
wrote on 14 January 2010 at 15:58
A term I have hear recently and think is stellar concept for communicators –> network weaving http://is.gd/6h0f3 (h/t @ZoeticaMedia)
15zards
wrote on 21 January 2010 at 16:40
Closing Triangles: The Fine Art of Network Weaving – http://ow.ly/Z6Iq via @nurturegirl
16Linda Kirkpatrick
wrote on 30 January 2010 at 10:53
New to social networking, I am trying to figure it out. Thank you for the information on Network Weaving. As I learn, I will continue to ask questions. My one issue is how do I use it to raise the understanding and importance of what our program does in addressing domestic violence. My time is limited and my understanding is this should not be consuming my time. Again thank you for the great information and expertise you share.
17JeanRussell
wrote on 1 February 2010 at 18:05
Thank you all!
Linda, I can see network weaving being a critical component of your program. I haven’t seen stats on it, but my guess is that women who suffer from domestic abuse would benefit from being well woven with others, reducing their social dependence on abusers and creating peer support for their recovery. Does your program encourage women to connect with others like themselves, especially women who have made it a few steps further in extracting themselves from violence?
Next, a woven network of donors, champions, and allies can create a resilient space for your organization to be successful. When you connect people who share a belief in your cause, you may be able to increase how often they talk about your work or contribute to it (financially or with time or connections etc). Again, these are guesses, as I am not the analytics/research person. Furthermore, from a social media perspective, having your network of supporters talking to each other can reduce how much you need to say in the space and enable you to rally them collectively to your cause. Doing this well is an art form that can ripple very positively. Doing this poorly can be time consuming and require a steep learning curve. Take the time to think it through. Are any advocates for your organization fairly intuitive network weavers? What can you do to invite them to help you weave?
Thank you Linda. And best of luck!
18cv harquail
wrote on 3 February 2010 at 10:27
A small strategy for weaving your social web, from Nurture » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
19Anastasia M. Ashman
wrote on 3 February 2010 at 10:36
RT @cvharquail: A small strategy for weaving your social web, from Nurture » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
20Valdis Krebs
wrote on 3 February 2010 at 11:18
RT @cvharquail: A small strategy for weaving your social web, from Nurture » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
21sandymaxey
wrote on 3 February 2010 at 12:06
RT @cvharquail: A small strategy for weaving your social web, from Nurture » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
22XNet
wrote on 3 February 2010 at 15:30
A small strategy for weaving your social web » Closing Triangles http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d via @nurturegirl @cvharquail @valdiskrebs
23Christy Lewis
wrote on 13 February 2010 at 12:18
RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
24Valdis Krebs
wrote on 13 February 2010 at 16:43
RT @EconGrrl: RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
25Connie Loden
wrote on 13 February 2010 at 17:30
RT @EconGrrl: RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
26Karim R. Lakhani
wrote on 13 February 2010 at 19:27
RT @EconGrrl: RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of #networkweaver @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
27newliving
wrote on 16 February 2010 at 12:30
RT @EconGrrl: RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d
28Christy Lewis
wrote on 16 February 2010 at 15:00
RT@christineegger All intros not created equal. Here's how to do it right, courtesy of @NurtureGirl http://bit.ly/6ZbA6d